Oh Gwyneth Paltrow, please never change. Gwynnie’s ‘advice’ never fails to bring the laughs, especially when she gets all sanctimonious and judgy – which, let’s face it, is all the time. Now that she has her new cookbook book coming out, ironically called ‘It’s all Good’, she’s been doing promotion and shoving her face and quotes on every possible magazine. Right now, she’s covering Self Magazine, and she talks about how much her new diet has helped her with her long-time husband, Chris Martin.
To be honest, the only time Gwyneth ever manages to engender pity is regarding her husband. We don’t profess to know what’s going on in their relationship, but we do have to say that seeing how desperately he tries to avoid her sometimes makes us feel a little sorry for her. Of course, that tiny bit of pity completely disappears as soon as she opens her mouth and out drips out another pearl of wisdom that she simply must share with the world.
In the Self interview, Gwyneth spends a lot of time discussing how much her diet has changed her relationship with her husband. She says, “You feel lighter and your emotions get smoother. [I] had a lot of unexpressed anger. I made everyone else’s feelings more important than my own. I’d suck it up and then be alone in my car yelling at traffic or fighting with hangers in my closet when they got stuck together.”
You know what that means, don’t you? Gwyneth and Chris just end up having a lot of angry sex every time she starts in on him. She pretty much admits too, by saying, “Dealing with things directly changed my relationships. Sometimes when you get clear about who you are, others get less comfortable because they liked who you were. It’s changed my marriage, too, but he’s up for the challenge.”
Isn’t that nice? She doesn’t want to say that their sex life has gotten lots better, so she uses flowery language to cover up what she really means. In essence, she’s saying that if you want to orgasm like she does, you better follow her diet. There truly is nothing like sanctimonious and judgy advice about how to live the ‘right way’, and I don’t think there’s anyone who does it better than Gwyneth.
Image Credit: Self Magazine