Harry Styles, Zayn Malik, Niall Horan, Liam Payne, and Louis Tomlinson are currently some of the biggest names in the Celeb World. They feed off fame, fortune, and love from fans, so why wouldn’t they want a chance to increase that celebrity awesomeness tenfold by including themselves in the running for one of the most coveted roles in Hollywood?
If you haven’t caught onto the fact that Fifty Shades of Grey is one of the most talked about movies of the decade, then you are probably living under a rock. Scratch that. You are probably living in a very deep hole beneath a rock. Scratch that. You are probably living underneath a larger rock, in a very deep hole, beneath that original rock we started with. It’s nearly impossible to escape the Fifty Shades of Grey fad, which is sort of hilarious given the content of the book: bursting with sexual deviancy, grounded in hardcore BDSM action.
So which One Direction bandmate aspires to play the role of Christian Grey in the upcoming adaption of EL James’s super sexy time novel? Well, sorry to disappoint you, folks . . . but I’m afraid not a single 1Der has expressed interest in stepping into Christian Grey’s shoes. At least to my knowledge. By all means if I’ve missed something call me out on it. Loud and proud.
However, just because nobody wants (or is qualified) to play Christian Grey, doesn’t mean the 1Ders haven’t scanned over the pages of EL James novel. The novel has quickly been classified as “Mommy Porn,” due to the middle-aged female demographic for which it is aimed, and sometimes little British eyeballs get curious. Which lad has taken a read?
If you guess lil’ baby Niall Horan, then you’d be wrong. Try picturing a more scandalous 1Der, a young rascal who thought he’d get ballsy and date Taylor Swift (bad move, dude).
Harry Styles has admitted to reading Fifty Shades, and he even claims he might be able to use it as a maybe-it-could-teach-him-a-few-things-about-sex handbook. Um, weirdsauce. He thinks it’s an “educational and interesting read.” I guess it could be if your into strangling people with neckties and trying to navigate “The Red Room of Pain.”
I find it troubling to picture the 1Ders in any scene relating to Fifty. How about you? If you had to cast a 1Der in a Fifty Shades role, who would you choose?
More in our One Direction: Who Is/Was/Still/Wants series: So far we’ve determined who had the highest Celeb IQ, chatted about the not-so-secret sex lives of the bandmates, attempted to delineate who’s the most hated and despised, and told you who’s the biggest baby. What’s next?
Image credit to FameFlynet