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Kris Jenner Plans Rob Kardashian Gastric Bypass Surgery for Weight Loss and Diabetes Control?

There’s a bandwagon with Kris Jenner’s name on it. It’s called The Rob Kardashian Diabetes Train and it’s ready for liftoff. After years of awkward estrangement from the Kardashian family, Rob shot back into the entertainment news hemisphere during a near-comatose and undiagnosed diabetes episode.

The incident helped the embattled reality star to rekindle the family flame with Khloe Kardashian. And if rumours are to be believed, even his mom, the Jane Fonda-esque Kris Jenner, swept him up like a wad of cash and said sorry in hushed tones.

Love means never having to say you’re sorry, except when there’s money involved.

Several diabetes-related organizations offered Rob Kardashian ludicrous amounts of money to become their “celebrity face”. However, Rob’s severe weight gain (caused by crippling depression and ill health) is an alleged blemish on the Kardashian family name. So much so that Kris offered to pay for Rob’s gastric bypass surgery.

Wait, what?

Kris is purportedly so “worried about Rob’s health” that she went ahead and scheduled a session with one of Los Angeles’ top weight-loss surgeons. We are unsure whether Rob gave his permission, or if he’s even aware of the upcoming surgery.

That’s Momager in action for you!

In 2005/2006, gastric bypass surgery had a 0.5% mortality rate – 15% of patients experienced severe post-surgical complications. According to an article published in 2014, “Mortality and complications are affected by pre-existing risk factors such as degree of obesity, heart disease, obstructive sleep apnea and diabetes mellitus.”

He needs therapy and some TLC, not surgery! Kris, however, requires an immediate lobotomy and a copy of “Mommy for Dummies”. Only then will she learn how to stop helicopter-parenting her life-sized puppets.

Manipulation, regurgitation or intimidation? Is Kris Jenner helping or hindering Rob Kardashian? Why the sudden “Save Rob” campaign? You decide. Let us know what you think in the comments below.

Renier Palland:
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